Hey mama,
She was 17.
He was 18.
They have been together ever since.
Now she is 43 and he is 44 and they struggle with sex.
Well, not. That is not true. Let me paraphrase.
He wants to have more sex, but she doesn’t have a desire or interest in it.
He wants her to be more playful, more explorative, more appreciative of his efforts.
He wants results (i.e. more sex).
He bought sex toys, lubes, massage oils, etc.
His approach is mechanical.
When something is ‘broken’ it needs fixing.
So let’s fix it?
She follows his lead in sex because,
“he knows better”
“he is smart”
“he is hardworking”
“he has a great work ethic and I admire that.”
“he makes better decisions that me”
So why does it still not work?
Why is it still not ‘fixed’?
Why does she still not want more sex?
They love each other.
They want to stay together.
But their marriage is wabbly because she had fallen into a pattern of giving her power away to him.
She wants to feel more connected to him and enjoy their time together.
Here’s the thing, though.
She needs it to be done her way.
Not his way.
Her way.
She wants more flow, ease, freedom, magnetism, satisfaction, and fulfillment in life and sex.
She doesn’t want to feel,
obligated,
coerced,
forced,
convinced into sex.
She wants to want it herself.
I believe she can.
I refuse to believe that she is not a sexual being, or that she doesn’t deserve to enjoy sex.
All humans are sexual beings.
Enjoying a nourishing and fulfilling sex life is our birthright!
So how do we do this in a marriage?
How do we do this in a way that sustains both of us?
Today’s podcast episode is all about the difference between co-dependency and inter-dependency in marriage and how to create the right dynamic for a joined and healthy sex life?
Enjoy listening!!
Much love & healing,
xoxo,
Dorit
p.s. Want to go from ‘sucked dry’ to strong, energized and sexy again? Join my 5-day challenge today! Follow this link: www.healthbeginswithmom.com/challenge
Show Notes
His Needs, Her Needs, revised and expanded edition: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage