It’s been a while since we talked. I usually try to stay in touch with you at least once a week, but the last two weeks were pretty exhausting and I needed some serious down time. Kids were home for two weeks during winter break and only after they went back to school/daycare I realized how exhausting it was. My kids go to full day programs from a very young age so I am not used to having them around the whole day.
Here’s how our days looked from my kids perspective vs. mine:
Wake up around 8:30am (without an alarm clock!), play, brush teeth? dress up? Eat breakfast, play, eat, play, watch something educational (or sometimes stupid) on Youtube/Netflix, eat, bed time already? booooooo
Wake up around 6am. pee. brush teeth. dress up. make up? brush hair? Screw it. Forced smile at the mirror :). Write in journal, plan my day. Drink 1/2 litre water (with lemon or apple cider vinegar), open computer. Close it, kids are up. Kiss them, play with them, smile and laugh even if you feel like crap. Brush their teeth, comb their hair, prepare their clothes, help them to get dressed, spend half an hour on the stairs (wait while my younger daughter goes up and down). Prepare breakfast for kids & green smoothie for myself (only to find it around 12pm still standing on the counter because I forgot to drink it). Get into a three-five hour loop of feed / entertain, and then around 7pm watch a short silly kid movie. 7:30pm bath time, brush teeth, story, bed time.
8pm Work? Husband? Sex? Ohh forget it, Sleep!!!
That was pretty much my life for two weeks, but I’m better now and want to share an exciting insight with you.
After kids went back to school I decided it is time to be nice to myself and thought of something I wanted to do for a really long time and never had the time for. Update my wardrobe!
I don’t know if you can relate, but I feel like since my kids were born I am having a serious wardrobe crisis. Constantly gaining and loosing weight due to child birth has taken its toll on me and subconsciously I have been buying cheep clothes (mostly sweat pants), opting for mostly black and grey shades and due to a lack of time throwing everything into the dryer.
Since I work from home I am used to wearing my schmata during the day but when the rare occasion of going out arises, I recite my husband’s “favourite” sentence: “I don’t have anything to wear”!
That’s when I realized that I need help. So I decided to hire a wardrobe makeover consultant.
In the beginning I was very skeptical about this service, and also scared that it would cost a fortune. but thanks to my husband’s support I finally decided to go for it and we booked a two hours session.
Eagerly and patiently I waited for my help, and the day has finally come. We said “Hi” politely and went upstairs, and then she goes like: “is that all you’ve got?”. Yes, that’s all I’ve got. Sorry.
What started as an awkward encounter turned into a liberating process that got me to think about myself as a mother and the way I am taking care of myself. My saviour (aka the wardrobe consultant) told me that I have to stop buying cheep clothes and also not throw everything into the dryer. We went through my already minimized collection of schmata (old clothes in Yiddish) and she could not find anything that is worth to keep. Seriously? Yes!
But I must admit, I really enjoyed the closet detox part.
I got some great tips on how to shop for my body type and how to create the best looks using my figure. How to dress modestly and elegantly but with grace and chic. We talked about the role of clothes and style in a woman’s life, and what happens when we don’t enjoy looking at ourselves in the mirror.
What does my unflattering choice of clothes say about me?
Being a mother has changed me from top to bottom, physically, mentally and emotionally. I had to give away my favourite jeans I wore to my first date with hubby, when I was size 34. Or my lovely tiny black dress which I bought on our honeymoon in Italy. That wasn’t easy, but nevertheless had to be done.
While cleaning out my wardrobe, I couldn’t stop but thinking about the similarities between clothes and food. We attach emotions to clothes in the same way we attach emotions to food. There are things in our closets which we just cannot get rid of because it is such an integral part of us. The same rational goes for food, some foods are really hard to give up on, and the reason behind it is mostly emotional.
Two things I’ve learned from this experience
Firstly, I learned that cleansing, detoxing and de-cluttering are essential to a growing and evolving human being, especially for women. It is truly liberating.
Secondly, if you can detox, whatever it is, on your own – amazing! But if not ASK FOR HELP! Don’t just wait until someone will come and save you. It won’t happen. In the meantime you have kids to raise (unfortunately they learn by example), and a household to run so you have to get yourself together and fast! Own your life, you chose to be a mother, so you must learn how to take care of yourself, if you don’t – ask for help. Think about it as a high leverage activity, when you invest in yourself everyone around you win.
Where in your life do you feel the need to cleanse? Detox? De-clutter? Change? Update?
What is holding you back? Do you find it hard to let go? Why?
Share your thoughts below, I would love to have a chat with you!
Until next time,
To your family’s health!